Taste Life

Every year we write down our 07, 08, 09 … etc resolution, one would like to quit smoking, the other wants to do well in school and many others that passed on me, and like everyone else i made mine every year this year i chosed to do something different, i want to have a new resulotion for every month instead of every year.

Till the end of April, i shall not give any advices to any person weather they asked me for it or not. My mouth should not say “Don’t do that” “Its better if you do” ” why did you” “its not good” etc. Also i should not get angry at all, lately i’ve been very sensitive when i see others react foolishly - specially you- that every time i feel like hitting them, sometimes i feel my heart pondering out of my chest.

Hurray 20 days anger free and advice free, lucky you.

For the past week, every word i say has to end with ” gosh judy you really have grown up”

I always thought its a good thing to be grown up and mature, but the funny part is i haven’t changed a bit since high school, more experience true but my personality is pretty much the same, the same thoughts, the same believe, the same attitude the only difference i became an angry person due to certain recent events. I never knew being angry resembles matureness !

There are certain moments when you need others to believe what you are saying is the right thing without having hours of communication  to prove what you are saying is right but as part of growing up i realized its a big waste of time,

Only when i finally expressed my thoughts, i’ve been “gosh you really got old” and its such a waist of time..so I’m silent again. Its good to be silent.

I really don’t know what i just wrote, all i know is i’ll be home within a week.. I’m scared, happy, anxious and excited.  

Pre birthday celebrations was able to draw a smile,

a pre birthday dinner was able to make my giggle till my face hurts

but my birthday morning is the last thing i would ever want on a birth date.. so instead of relating the sadness i saw this morning to my birthday, i decided to believe that today is just another day. I’m a grown up women now, officially, and birthdays shouldn’t be a big of a deal and that is just the start.

I usually love to have a busy morning on my birthday to believe that the whole year will be a busy year, but i hate it when you wake up with someone who would tell you ” happy birthday” as if they’ve been force to say it, or go out with someone yelling and shouting in anger …

Actually all that i can bear, what i can’t bear is rudeness..

I really hate rude people, i can’t understand them , i can’t be around them and it is really hard to hold my self from doing stupid things.

Once i’m around a rude person all i feel is numbing in my right hand, sudden strength that makes my grip stronger .. I am afraid i might lose control on this hand one day, specially when rudeness effects one of my family members .

I’m supposed to write something happy today, actually i was ready to write something happy, but even though the happiness i wanted didn’t happen, i am happy that my family are healthy and mom is happy on my birthday. There is nothing better than that.

Lets see it from the bright side, those rude people are extra salty, extra spicy, they spice up our life.

Todays 25th lesson:

Hold your anger, hold your tears and smile

And that’s what I’ve mastered before reaching this age

Happy Birthday to me , Its not how i wanted it to be, but I’m still very happy.

i shall re-write this post later.

CN tower is celebrating earth hour

Tomorrow the 29th of March 2008 Toronto City will turn off all its lights for one hour from 8 pm to 9 pm to save 5% of energy for the coming generations.

In that matter, the city decided to celebrate with their national singer Nelly fertado to encourage people to turn off their lights and celebrate their calls for peace and protection of the coming generation.

If you have a young one in the family you will definitely understand why we should save for those little ones, if not just take couple of minutes and think after 10 years a whole generation of teenagers might spend their days without water and electricity. So instead of being more technological and high tech, we will be going to the first man kinda living.

And for all the lovers out there.. think of this hour as a romantic getaway, on candle lights and nice home meal .. and if you have kids, an indoor camping night, or sing a birthday song for an hour but don’t forget to sing for me too

Celebrate peace Kuwait, celebrate to save.

(link)  

I’ve always had issues with organizing my shoes, i hate boxes, i hate them without boxes, i love my shoes free LOL even though I’m in sever need for shoes and not big fan of them … i found this crazy wacky shoes organizer… i think i would definitely get one if i had that amount of shoes.

Check me out

في ناس وين ماتروح خشمهم وراك

وين ما تمشي خشمهم لاحقك

وين ما تتكلم خشمهم يقاطعك

عسى ما فتحت عينك الا خشمهم بعيونك

صار عندك بلوق كل يوم ببلوقك

صار عندك سياره، كل يوم وراك بالشارع ولا ماخذينها منك

و فوق هذا لما تبي اتسافر يقررون سفرتك و لا ياخذون منك بقشيش

طب الحلاوه! مش عاوزين الحلاوه!

ما يبون الحلاوه

عيل ليش كل  يوم ورانا !!

ماكو جراح يشيل هالخشم من عرجه؟

لازم في طريقه احسن من الخشم للتنفس

There are many subjects i can talk about.. and many issues i can discuss.. and many stories i can tell.. but one thing i feel like letting out of my mouth

Meyaw !

I wish if it can translate all the things i want to say .

source: typofile.com

When someone is truly loved, one will be happy for their happiness

When it is a crush on someone, hatred can take place.

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I’ve been looking around to get my own site..

and i found some interesting sites share the same name of my blog ‘Taste Life’

Tastelife(dot)com

and Tastelife(dot)net .. is worth 2788.00$

WOW i’m expensive LOL !

Time is wrapping up, the clock is ticking calling for a return, return to the desert, a return to reality a return to beg and hassle to get what i deserve.

Thoughts in my head rushing, “am i ready to go back? ” when there shouldn’t’ be such a question, i shouldn’t ask if I’m ready , because i have nothing here, family is home, job is home and friend are at home too … why shall i stay more in this land of beauty.. why should i enjoy the snow and never miss the dust? Why do i feel safer here.

As tears take their way out of their conjunction, answers seemed to be clear.

On this land, even though i don’t belong to it, i am treated like a human being with feelings and needs, the simplest thing i feel welcomed when i go buy milk from the grocery shop, i feel happy when i share the same bus with hundreds of others without feeling less or uncomfortable around, without having someone telling me how much they can spend for a bag or how much they hate that beautiful women… and if i felt like closing my eyes and sleep till my destination, i would without hearing someone expressing their pity for my tiredness.

feeling like going to the movies? no problem, all i have to do check the times and go , i don’t have to be competitive and wake up earlier than usual just to get tickets from the movie theater close to my resident and when I’m actually there .. i would simply hear “welcome to cineplex theater, how may i help you” aaah that on its own big stress relief.

Not everyone is polite here, but its not the common thing, but from my little experience of many years in college , politeness was governed with benefits and flirting.

Is this why i don’t want to return ! ? did i really became that frustrated that little things like hanging out is annoying me! of-course not.

I’ll be going to a new phase of my life, a phase that no one seems to be enjoying, having a job. I didn’t start yet and people are showering me with advices how not to be friends with colleagues and how to find my way to promotions while the last person i met here got a job in a rough place and all they told him ” here these are the people i know, you will have so much fun with them” and they don’t even know each other well !

Still these aren’t the reasons i don’t want to go back .. its not the people, its not the system, its not the new phase or even the weather.. its me, I’m relaxed here away from all influences, away from all the stress, able to leave the house in pony tail and the same coat i had on yesterday without being looked at from head to toe, or meeting someone who will tell all my family ” i met judy the other day and she looked terrible”

Its the peace of mind isolation gives yet that’s the only benefit of minding your own business, on other scales its very lonely, tiring and god damn cold.

Its time to go back, in a month or so, I’m ready to go back .. without losing an inch and without faking a smile.. I’m going back because for good or the worse i promised to be a Kuwaiti Citizen, to produce even if it takes years to complete an hour task, even if it took hours to reach a ten minute destination and even if i had to pay hundreds of KD’s to get the wrong diagnosis and die at a young age.

I’ll be back praying, calling and praying more that the Kuwait i grew up in, the Kuwait that my parents worked hard for will treat us again like human beings with brains, feelings and souls without looking deep into our wallets or the ancestry of our origins.

Kill me, torture me, segregate me, steal my money, tie my tongue, dry my throat, make me sick.. you can’t stop me.